| just some little things in my head, fighting to get out |
[25 Jul 2008|12:58pm] |
See the problem with this stupid livejournal is that I still can't say EVERYTHING that I'd like to, because there are still CERTAIN things that I don't want anyone to know. I'd love to release everything in my head onto this stupid website, but it would backfire. Maybe not right away, but eventually. Too many snakes who check in on me constantly. But then again if I were to write in an ACTUAL physical journal, I'd feel as though it were for nothing, because it would still be an altogether private matter. It's like, I want advice, but I want to get advice anonymously from people who don't know who the fuck I am or how the fuck to find out.
I don't know.
Hm.
On the brighter side of things, Romeo's last day of work before he leaves for the Army is Monday. Then I'll see him tons and tons more. We're going to finish a lot of things on the house before he leaves too, hopefully move in completely. I have a potential tenant coming to check out the upstairs apartment on Friday.
My friend Ryan wanted to live there, but I don't think that's going to happen. I still have to sort through some things and I'm waiting to hear back from him, but like he is asking to pay $250 less than what I am (VERY GENEROUSLY) renting out the apartment for. I'm not here to make sure everyone else is financially sound - I need to make sure I'm taken care of as well. I mean, who would do that for me? Not a damn body. Exactly.
Plus, if anything happened, which I'm not saying it would, BUT IF IT DID, then it's a lot easier to crack the whip on some stranger, rather than a friend. I just don't want to get myself into a fucked up situation and ruin a friendship.
Who knowsssssss ahhhhh. Any advice?
Work blows. I love my job but I hate specific things about the people I work with. Gary, for instance. He's a shitty bastard of an old man and he lies and cheats us out of our tables and hes crabby and annoying and immature and he drives me up a fucking WALL. Tony's back, so NOBODY feels like they have any job security. Everyone is so on-edge constantly. I am nervous when he's there, and I just am praying it doesn't show through to my tables. Also, Vinny's on a power trip - although John hasn't been crazy ego-tripping on me since I talked to him about it, so that's a good thing.
I don't know. I'm starving. I'm supposed to be packing and cleaning but my head hurts soooo bad.
I think I'm guna get off here and pray for my headache to go away and just have those private thoughts turn over and over in my head until I fall asleep. Yep, sounds good to me - NAPTIME!!
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[15 Jul 2008|01:40am] |
I have many confusions in my head lately, about lots of different things. Maybe it's just the stress?
Closing on this house has me going insane. The seller is a piece of work and keeps coming up with more shit we have to get done. It's stressing me out. Now that we've stayed at the Canton house for so damn long waiting for the shit to finally go through, we have to pay rent AND our mortgage on August 1st. Thrilling. Honestly.
23 days til Romeo goes off to Ft. Knox/Auberdine for 7 months. Honest, I don't know what I'm going to do. He's my rock. I can't even let him know how much I am sad about it, cause I don't want him to feel like shit going into it.... so that's definately causing some tension.
We're tense in general lately. We NEVER EVER EVER in our entire 9 months have fought. Teensy little disagreements that end in 5 minutes, while we're still holding each other's hands, yeah... a few of those. So insignificant I can't even remember any. But we have NEVER fought. We still don't really... but we've been so snippy with each other the past two weeks, like both of us are just at our boiling points. It makes me sad I guess that there are any even remotely negative feelings between us... even if they're not really much. But I guess this is STILL a relationship, even if it does feel like it's straight out of a fairy tale.
Gary is a bastard at work. I'm going to do anything short of fellatio to get him fired. Seriously I hate that cocksucker. You're fucking 64 dude, I'm sorry you never were able to find a real job and make anything of yourself, but jump off my ass. People HATE you. The entire staff, save Vinny, HATES YOU!!!! We got into a hugeeeeee blowout tonight cause he's a rude, antagonistic bastard of an old man.
John brought me sushi.
Romeo brought Christopher up to see me.
I love how into our family he is. I love that he babysits, but doesn't call it babysitting.. he calls it "sharing the responsibility". I love that he drives 20 minutes just to come sit and let me kiss my child and hang out.
I do love him. I really do.
Blah. I'm just very blah.
I'll get over my little stress/crazy life.
I mean, when hasn't it been?
In the words of Sam....
"Crystal is not a bad person... she doesn't drink, smoke, steal, kill people, cheat on boyfriends, fuck other girls boyfriends... none of that. She's a GOOD person. But anything, and I mean ANYTHING that could POSSIBLY go wrong in someones life, or happen to someone.... happens to her. It's gotta be karma from a previous life?"
Yaknowww......
The 6th HP movie comes out November 21st!!! :).... and I have to see it without my love.
Ahh. Sam's bday, my love isn't my date... I just keep thinking of all these things we're NOT going to do together this year.
Thank GOD he'll be home for Thanksgiving and Christmas. I think. I hope.
Goodnight.
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| oh and also... |
[14 Jul 2008|03:51am] |
it's probably the funniest thing ever that Angie is talking shit about me TO PEOPLE I'VE NEVER MET IN MY LIFE.
How old are we c'mon? I know you sound like you're 4, but in people years you're actually closer to 20.
Get over yourself. Seriously. Don't talk shit about me when there's nothing you can say? I'm sorry I'm friends with someone you hate, thus you cut me from your own mental list of friends. You're a retarded bitch for that, just letting you know... Glad your own insecurities and pride broke up a 4 year old friendship.....
Makes me ill.
GAH. Tired. Night.
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| like, really though... |
[14 Jul 2008|03:47am] |
I see some of the girls that my ex's have previously, or currently are fucking/dating.. and I'm in fucking disbelief.
ARREEE YOUUU KIDDDINGGGG MEEEEE!?!?!?
Like, I don't think I'm hot shit...
But I am not THAT disgusting.
And these bitches are HIT.
Like.. with a club. The "Disgusting Nasty EW" club.
I feel kind of gross to be classified as dating the same people as some of these girls.
I just threw up in my mouth now... ew.
Seriously.
I swear to God I am not stuck up at all or like even remotely over-confident. But I'm also not RETARDED. I have eyes, and enough brain cells in my skull to differenciate an ugly bitch from a pretty bitch.
GAG................................!!!!!!!
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| that feeling |
[09 Jul 2008|02:22am] |
Like.. body tired, but ... completely awake in the brain??
I believe the correct term maybe would be "exhausted"..?
Who knows.
I got arrested today. For some bullshit I thought was cleared but wasn't.
THAT WAS SO FUN!!
Grrr...
Work was annoying. John pulled his ego-trip shit on me again. I almost punched him, I swear.
Vinny cut me without me asking ... and gave away my fucking section to GARY'S bitch ass.
But it's whatever.
"It's a hair flip".
lol... I'm guna try to sleep.
Night.. :)
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| my obsession |
[06 Jul 2008|12:24pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 grateful |
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music |
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Justin Nozuka - After Tonight |
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So, I've always loved pictures, I've always loved taking pictures, so I could re-live the memories later, but... I don't know, over the past year, things have changed. I feel an unbelievable pull to document everything.
I guess I could blame it on Jason dying. He made me realize how short life can be and how quickly we can just disappear, leaving nothing BUT a few pictures. If I die tomorrow, I want my son to relive our life together visually.
I know this sounds morbid, but I was just thinking about it. I was upstairs taking pictures of Christopher wallowing around on the floor and our roommate was like "You always have that damn camera, it's like your third arm.
Yeah, it is.
Jason, for those of you who don't know this, was my best friends fiance. Sam Monforton. They bought a house together last year and they were one of the happiest couples I've ever been around. They loved each other completely. January 8th of this year, Jason passed. He wasn't an alcoholic, he didn't smoke, he didn't do drugs, he worked a modest job at his parent's company, and he wouldn't have ever hurt a fly. He wasn't a crazy asshole who pissed their life away, he was a 27 year old guy with a beautiful fiance, a promising future, and never a bad attitude. One of the rare people who appreciated what they had. As Sam put it, he "never had a bad day". He always said he had an okay day, or a good day... he knew what bad was all about.
He went into the hospital for "routine" heart surgery (for him it was routine), during the middle of December, 2007. He was on life support during the operation, 6 hours. When they took him off, they expected his organs to just kinda jump back into action - as always it had been before during similar procedures. His kidneys and liver started to fail. Back on life support/dialysis. ICU for a few weeks, and a planned heart transplant. But before they ever got around to fixing him up, he stroked out. The night of the 7th/8th. The next day, they gathered his closest family and turned off the life support machines.
I can't even explain how proud I am of Sam for handling this the way she has. She's doing amazing. She accepts it, and she's trying to move on with her life. Over this past weekend she moved out of the home they shared, because she let it go into forclosure. She didn't want to afford it on her own, and they had only put it in HIS name, and obviously credit isn't one of his main concerns anymore.
But yeah, that's the biggest reason why I take pictures of every little thing/person/detail. Jason lives on through the photos Sam has hanging on her walls and resting in boxes in her room. I want that to be me if anything ever happens. I want, if GOD FORBID something happens to Christopher, to have ten million pictures of him so I can look at him all the time and remember the good times.
I don't know. Maybe I'm just strange. Maybe this year I'm just more AWARE of death. I know so many people who are losing their loved ones. My uncle is sitting in a hospital bed up at Huron Valley-Sinai right now, with a blood infection and leukemia. He's 38 years old.
On the bright side of things, Romeo and Topher and I went to the drive-in movies last night, and it was really fun. Even Topher enjoyed it :).
Today I have to work. Blah....
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[03 Jul 2008|03:27am] |
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mood |
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 contemplative |
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do you have any idea how much a year and a half can change people?
So I log into my livejournal for the first time since the beginning of 2007, and BLAM immediately I have 3 comment/message things from 3 of my then-closest friends. One from Meghan "MG" Carson. One from Mallory. One from Rachel K. Yaknow, the last girl was just saying to add her back as a friend, but the first two were some mumbo jumbo bullshit about how much they "love" me and "care" about me and will "always" be there for me.
I call bullshit. Let me tell you what, I'm no longer friends with any of those girls. Rachel, yeah I will be thrilled to see her when I do, but what happened to the Rachel I used to hang out with ALL the time? What happened to the girl who went with me to Coldstone and let me complain about my boy issues and we went to shows together and just had fun? I haven't seen her in ages. Probably last time I saw her was when I bumped into her at a Hawthorne Heights concert I took my ex to last summer. Mallory? She moved away without notice, kind of screwed her roommate over in the process, and has barely spoken a word to me since. Meghan? I won't even go there. It makes me annoyed just thinking about her.
I don't get how people can be so loyal one minute and then gone the next. Rachel, I guess doesn't fall in that category, we just drifted apart. The other two, it was so sudden and so extreme.
I guess I need to stop expecting everything to stay peachy. Basically at one point or another, EVERYONE will let you down. No matter who it is.
I read some old entries about David and I can't belieeeveeee myself. I can't believe how foolish I was and how deeply I let him affect me. We broke up last summer, praise the lord. He was tearing me apart from the inside out. He really did a number on the way I viewed myself and my worth. I really let a lot of things he said about me hinder my every day life.
I had a bumpy patch when we broke up, I got all party-happy and started going out every night. I briefly dated Bramer but we are SOOOO not good together as a couple, and he did things that caused me to resent being a parent for a little while, without me even realizing that's what was going on. Never Christopher, I never resented Christopher. Never think that for a minute... just made me resent that I had responsibilities I couldn't just drop at the mention of a plan.
I'm with someone now who treats me like I'm an absolute princess. He does everything and anything he can to make sure I'm happy. He has been my best friend for the past 4 years, and especially over the last year and a half. He's amazing, he's everything I used to write on here about someday hoping to find. He is my rock, he is my heart. He and Christopher are the most perfect family I could have ever asked to be blessed with. And oh my lord Romeo is SO GOOD with Christopher. I don't even understand how it happened but they've developed this intense bond, even I don't hold a candle to it to be completely honest.
They're amazing. Romeo is amazing. He's hard working and respectful and he doesn't smoke weed everyday (or ever actually), he doesn't have to have a beer in his hand to have a good time, he has a nice car (my dad's Chrysler actually, he bought that), and a decent job, and a REAL future.... and most importantly, he wants me IN his future. Everyday we talk about what we're doing with our lives in the coming years, and we plan everything out. We are closing on our new house this week. Everything is coming together, maybe not QUITE the way I planned, but I wouldn't change anything if it had kept me from being with Romeo.
The one bump coming soon is that he's leaving for the Army on August 7th. He'll be gone for at least 6 months. I can't complain, because as he puts it,
"Honey, if I were single I wouldn't be doing this. I'm doing this for us, I'm doing this so we can build our future and have a better life. For US not for me."
Who can argue with that?
I don't know. I'm just going to miss him like crazy. The new house will take some attention off the fact of my love being gone though.... I don't know how people like Lauren Soignet do this every single day. My boyfriend isn't even gone yet and I'm already crying like he is.
I'm ridiculous. I don't even know why I'm writing in here. My life is just super intense right now.
Since my last post, SO MANY things have changed. I quit my job then got rehired. People have died. New friends have been made. Old friends have been lost, or shoved brutally out. Debt has been introduced to my world, and I'm working my ass off to get back in control of myself.
And Christopher.... oh boy, where do I even start with Christopher. Never a more amazing piece of my life has there been than my little Christopher. I can't even explain how enriched my life has been because of that little brat. He's in his terrible twos. Oh my GOD are they TERRIBLE. He is a crazy man, defying child locks and gravity, and simultaneously warming my heart and curdling my blood with anger. He's more than I ever thought he could be, he's everything. He's each and every part of my day. He's my last thought before bed and my first waking up. I don't honestly know what I used to focus on before he came into my life??
I don't remember life before Christopher, and when I try to get nostalgic, it just feels like a dream, or a completely different person. He's not my little baby anymore, although always will he be. He's my walking talking 2 and a half year old wonder child.
I can't even express in words the impact Christopher and Romeo have on me.
Yet again I don't know why I'm writing in here, I guess I just get in these "livejournal" modes every couple years lol.
I don't know. I'll try to keep updating. God knows that while Romeo is gone, I'll be in this bitch er'day trying to whine and complain about how much I miss him.
Tons on my mind and I don't even know why. The only reason I used to be in these moods was when I was having boy problems... well theres never a problem with my boy, and here I am in this "think" mode. I guess that's just how things go.
I have so much more to say about so many different things but shockingly enough my eyes are starting to blur a bit, and I have to get up earlyish cause I'm going with bug to lay out and swim at Clarissa's with Jenny and possibly Ashley. Jessica turns 21 tomorrow night so we're going out again........
Love love love<3
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[09 Feb 2007|12:38am] |
Today ended up being okay.
Spent time with my dad, and grandma.
Christopher is so fun, he was such a ham today :).
Didn't have Dave calling 8million times, which I actually kind of missed...
But oh well.
I've gotta get used to it.
Had Arby's and Baskin Robbins for dinner/dessert. DELICIOUS.
Then like.. just now got back from late-night rendezvous at a diner with some friends I haven't seen in ages.
It's fluffy right now.
I'm so tired.
I called Dave to see if he wanted to meet up with us, but he had some girl in the background, saying "OHHH YEAH DAVEEE OHHH YEAHHHH" and whoever/whatever that was all about, I'm straight. He's one of those who isn't right for a relationship. He needs constant "play". He can't just sit at home and hang out. He constantly needs to be out doing something, or if he's at home, he's got to be watching TV, or on his laptop. I am starting to see him for who he really is.
I miss the COMFORT of having him around, but I don't miss the disrespect. And even if the girl on the phone wasn't being serious, I don't care. That's incredibly disrespectful, he would have like honest-to-God given me the biggest bitch-fest if one of my friends had ever done that while I was on the phone with him, let alone, if I had ever been with anyone who possessed a penis who wasn't an immediate member of my family.
It's whatever. I need to get away from life right now. I want to start fresh, somewhere that ISN'T here. I want to pack up Christopher and all our stuff, and say "SEE YA" to everyone around here. I'm really going to miss Dave's mom and dad. Especially his mom, GOD I love her. She's really great. She loves Christopher. I don't know how we're going to let her know, I can't just disappear, I want her to be able to still see Christopher if she wants. I guess that will be hard if Dave moves back to his parents. SIGH. Why does everything have to be so hopelessly complicated and sad?
He still won't tell me who is moving out. I need to know. He's got himself to worry about... I have myself, AND Christopher. I wish he'd take that into consideration. It's whatever at this point, I just want things civil.
I wish a lot of things were different. I wish things weren't this hard. I would say I wish we'd never even been together, to avoid the hurt this is causing, but I don't think I would change it for the world. He was great, and he IS great in a lot of ways, we just didn't work right. But I hope maybe I gave him some insight into certain things, and maybe he'll remember Christopher, and the good memories with him... and I learned a lot. I care about Dave a lot, more than I've cared for pretty much anyone I've dated. He's been there for the biggest event of my life.
A chapter is ending, I wonder what the next will be? Who knows, maybe this time next year I'll finally have moved out of Michigan. <3
I cannot believe I still write in this thing LOL.
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| "STUPIDIDNESS" |
[08 Feb 2007|03:26am] |
Seriously. Someone (I won't disclose the name) used the word "stupididness" today. In an arguement against me. In a totally serious way. Something about how they can't deal with my "stupididness" sometimes.
HAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAH
holy fucking shit... gasp...
HAAAAAAAAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!
Okay.
His new job: fucking ridiculous. His job interview? EVEN MORE SO.
His outlook on my life: his own personal opinion. Doesn't change me. THANKS for the input, now you can jump off my balls and leave me the hell alone.
His cruelty: has hit an alltime high.
His cheating: practically official.
His cool-meter: steadily decreasing.
His spring break: such a fucking crock of shit.
Yes, ladies and gents, he is going on spring break. At THIS point, I could care less, but I would have left him anyways if we were still together. Because he never for a moment thought he was NOT going, and he is "so broke" but he can afford a fucking trip to fucking Panama fucking city fucking Florida for fucking SPRING BREAK..... but he can't help me with OUR cable or electricity bills when I'm fucking up to my ears in debt?
Are you kidding me????
Someone, oh please someone, tell me where all the real men have gone. The kind-hearted, family-oriented, amazing men? The one's who aren't players/liars/cheaters/selfish bastards/overly self-obsessed/internet psychos???!?!?!
Seriously. I've dated complete strangers, friends, "blind" dates, myspacers, long-distance, younger, older, in-crowders, socially challenged, sweethearts, rude pricks...!?!? What the hell is left? I don't understand. I really don't.
On a brighter note, I got a job tonight! I'm not saying anything until it's set in stone, but a friend of my dad's pulled through in a big way, and this is a really good thing for me if all goes according. Money + benefits = happy Crissi. Funny how it happened mere hours after I finally realized that Dave and I are NEVER going to make any sort of amends. His loss, my gain. I will find myself a great guy who will appreciate me for ALL of me, not just the me who makes great money and has "my shit" together. I need someone who will stick with me through the hard times too.
Christopher is 10 months old. I feel like this past year has been a complete blur. I don't know how it has gone as fast as it has. I want to press the pause button. My baby is growing into a little toddler-boy. MY BABY. I want to keep my baby for forever and ever. This past year has been so amazing in so many ways... but I've also never hit such a low as I have the past few months. I'm just overwhelmed.
I promise this though... I will get back on my feet, I will be stronger, I will NOT fall for someone so easily or drop my standards ever again to include anyone who isn't good to their parents, or affectionate enough for me. I will suceed, eventually (somehow), and I will prove it to everyone, and especially myself, that I am not "worthless" or "going nowhere".
I owe it to myself, I owe it to Christopher. I'm smart... those classes I used to take weren't for nothing. I'm just a human being, and I've made some major decisions in my life that have landed me in a place I never ever in my wildest dreams thought I'd be.
I have a notion, dear journal, that we are going to become very very close again in the next few months. I need someone to talk to. For the past year I've been fooling myself into believing that I had that in Dave... but he tells me "I usually just tune you out honestly."
SO FUCK HIM. :) I can do better. I want someone who WANTS to hear what is going on with me, what I'm thinking, what my opinion is, stories from when I was little... I want someone who cares about ME and what makes me tick, not just what I can offer them materialistically. I don't need that kind of person in my life. I can't fucking believe I let it happen to me in the first place???
I love HIM. But we've fallen out of love long long ago. And I think he never was to begin with to be completely honest.
-Brushing my shoulders OFF.-
More love soon to come, I don't know who else to bitch to!! ;)
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[03 Feb 2007|06:14pm] |
Oh I forgot to mention...
Ashley and Allyson are having girls, Caroline and Misty are pregnant, and I finally met Kara's little girl Ava. She's gorgeous!
Also, I haven't talked to Sammy Monforton in awhile... I don't know what to say. I'm really upset about the work thing, and the fact that she TOLD them not to hire me back. I have a baby, and rent, and medical bills STILL from when I had him... I just can't believe my BEST friend would do that to me? I don't know what to say, because I feel really betrayed. I don't know. I don't need her yelling at me right now. That's all I hear from Dave, I don't need it from her too. She thinks she is so much better than me, but she's NEVER had to deal with what I've had to deal with. I miss her, but I don't know how I feel about her right now aside from that. I'm confused.
And Meghy and I are trying to throw together a trip to Virginia Beach. We'll go down to visit Jay, and we're guna have Lauren from NC meet us there, it should be a blast. I'll probably ask Heather if she wants to have the baby while I go. I just want a break from Michigan, and life in general. I won't probably get a chance like this until Christopher is a LOT older. And I definately won't be a teenager when that happens!
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[17 Nov 2006|01:00am] |
I don't really know why I'm typing this to a computer, but I hate complaining to my friends, because they have their own issues and worries and they don't need me around bitching about my problems. So I guess all that's left is a fucking internet site. COOL. I'm pathetic.
No really, I am. David tells me at least once a day that I'm pathetic. Sometimes he also throws in that I'm worthless. He's full of compliments, that one. And then he wonders why I just don't give a shit anymore.
I don't really know how it came to this.
He's been there for me a lot, but I really crashed this past month, in a really big way. I had problems at work, I had personal issues, I had emotional issues, I've had every possible bad thing happen that could. My car was vandalized, so it's inoperable. I don't have the money to get it fixed, so I'm fucking stuck. I felt this way about a year ago.
Only this time it's worse. This time, it's like one of the worst feelings I can ever remember having. It sucks. I just want to cry, like all the time, but then I pretend like everything is okay, but really I don't know what the fuck is going on, or how to fix it. Dave is SO FUCKING MEAN to me, and it only makes everything else feel more and more awful.
When I say mean, I mean he is SO NEGATIVE. Just when I start to look towards the BRIGHT side of things, he's right there, ready and waiting to bring me back down.
Like 2 fucking seconds ago. He runs over here to see what I'm doing on my computer, so I minus the page, and he won't shut the fuck up, talking shit, saying I'm hiding something - YES I AM. I am hiding my fucking personal business, which you laugh in my face about.
He says "Look at your life... What do you really have going for you right now?"
Certainly not the guy I'm dating. And he thinks I can't do better. I HAVE done better before, and I WILL do 10 times better the next time around. Which will be soon.
I love him for the him he was before he got bitter and hostile.. but I really hate the him he is now.
I am not happy. And it's not getting any better. And it's not JUST about David, but he's making me absolutely miserable lately... I wish he'd just CARE, and stop being so fucking sadistic. He TELLS me that he does certain things because he likes to make me mad, or piss me off. What kind of shit is that?
UGH. I attract the winners.
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| cutsie |
[02 Nov 2006|04:04pm] |
Some pictures of me and the love bug.....
Not at all flattering pics of me, but he is SO FREAKIN CUTE!!!
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[20 Oct 2006|12:13am] |
Tonight FUCKING sucks.
Work was miserable, that crazy stalker was there.
I got my days all fucked up again because I'm the lowest on the todem pole.
I got home in a somewhat okay mood, regardless.
Dave was so mean to me.
SO FUCKING MEAN.
From the minute I walked in the door.
Seriously, like, I CANNOT DEAL WITH HIM.
Then he left.
Christopher was already sleeping so I didn't get to spend time with my bug.
THAT sucks. But he needs his sleep so it's okay.
Then... Kaitlyn had a friend with her, so I figured forget coming over, cause I didn't want to spend time with Kaitlyn's FRIEND... I wanted to spend time with Kaitlyn?
FINALLY I just fucking sprained my knee. Like... I can't fucking walk. So I sat down. AND NOW I'm scared to get up.
It hurts sooo bad.
Tomorrow is going to suck.
Because my knee is blasted.
I hate today.
It's a week late though, I thought Friday the 13th HAPPENED already??
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[18 Oct 2006|05:31pm] |
I got my nails done (painted only) like 2 days ago. They're already horrendously chipping.
I already miss my acrylics.
It's so funny how obvious about their appreciation of the tip the asians are at the place I get them done.
Like, it costs 8 dollars to get your nails painted? So I gave him a 3 dollar tip.. and he got all haughty. Sorry dude?
LOL. Oh well.
Christopher is wonderful, I couldn't ask for a more perfect baby.
Dave and I are rocky.. I love him so much, but things need to be fixed.
Work is okay. Tony is on a sobriety kick, and he's crazy moody - and of course taking it out on all of us.
Still making good money though.
Me and Dave went with Charles and Allyson to see the Texas Chainsaw Massacre THE BEGINNING. LOL. It was scaryyyy :(
I wanted to leave halfway through.
Yesterday Ally and I went to pick up 2 packages from my Momma's house, and then the mall.
We got LOTUS EXPRESS :) Cause they have the BEST orange chicken - ever.
Today I want spring rolls.
Actually, today I want to just SLEEP.
GOD I WOULD LOVE THAT.
I wish I could find someone to watch honeybuns so Mommy could get some rest. I hate feeling sick.
Sick sick sick.
I wish I weren't sick.
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[10 Oct 2006|11:58pm] |
My claddagh ring BROKE.
Yeah, the claddagh ring I've been wearing for about 7 years, it broke.
At a JEWELRY store of all places lmao...
So, what to do?
Order a new one. A nicer one.
Well, it's a bit different, but I fell in love with it.
J. B. Robinson is delightful, I'll tell you that much.
What else?
Oh... well lots I can't talk about on here, cause it's, yaknow, PERSONAL. And I probably get stalked or something.
DAVE has a stalker. Kind of. Yeah.
This girl he works with, she calls him and texts him, and he changed his NUMBER because of her, cause he didn't want her to know it, and she got it out of one of his friends phones. It's like, annoying at this point. It's a total respect thing the way I see it, she knows he has a girlfriend - yet she won't let his nuts go? More funny than anything, but Dave's actually starting to get mad. I told him I'm not really MAD just irritated. She leaves him voicemails and texts and he DOESN'T ANSWER ???? (hinthint). Oh well.
Oh yeah, and there's rumors flying around his work that we're breaking up? It's so funny how these people who don't even know ANYTHING about our life together or our relationship get these weird ass stories. Where do they come up with this shit? I don't even TALK to any of them lol. It's ridiculous.
They also think that Christopher is Dave's baby, which he ISN'T biologically. Dave's an amazing guy to Christopher, but we didn't even start dating until I was 6 months pregnant lol.
I love how people focus their lives around us.
Whatever. LOL.
Hmm... Today I went to lunch with Dave at the Asian Buffet in Plymouth, then he went home to "relax" before work (although there never is a time when he is home that he ISN'T "relaxing"), and I headed out to A2 to pick up my lovely cousin Heather. We went baby clothes shopping at Briarwood, and got SOOOOO many cute outfits. I can't wait to dress him upppp<3.
MORE PICS TOMORROWWWW <3
ps. Dave is gay.
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[08 Oct 2006|04:19pm] |
Christopher eating tortilla shell at Mongolian BBQ :)
Christopher and GREAT GRANDPA BRUCE!!
Aka, Grandma Nesi's new husband.
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[08 Oct 2006|03:37pm] |
Okayyy so I'm going to post a video clip of a tour of the apartment sometime tomorrow :) I finally finished Christopher's nursery, and I finally bought the entertainment center. Everything is as I want it to beeee and I'm thrilled. The only thing I would change about this apartment is that I would make the kitchen bigger. Well, I guess there's one more thing, but that's my next project :). I'm buying a new light fixture for hanging over the table in the dining room. Ours is stupid looking, and GOLD. Ugh. Yeah... the dining room is the last place I have home improvements. New light fixture, and a mini wet-bar in the corner. And, I'm going to move the table over a bit, and hang the light so that it is centered in the middle of the table. It's going to look amazing once I'm through with it.
It sucks, because next year, we're probably moving. Somewhere closer to my work maybe, who knows. A nicer area. I don't know.... maybe we'll stay here just one more year, and save some money. The rent at this place is only 600 a month. My monthly bills, baby included, equal about $1,400.
300 - my half of rent
75 - my cell phone
45 - Nathan's cell phone
100 - cable/internet
60 - electric
75 - diapers
180 - formula
40 - baby food (like, the peaches/plums/applesauce... that kind of thing)
200 - gas
50 - car insurance
150 - baby clothes (he's a growing boy!!)
100 - baby toys
200 - groceries
and then I still have Mommy clothes, and I get my nails/hair done. So in addition to my 1,400, add on like 300 or more lol. I'm a fool.
Oh and credit card payments, because I paid a lot of my medical bills off with my credit cards.
And Victoria's secret and Express charge cards.
As soon as everything is paid down, I'm putting almost every spare penny in the bank. And in 6 months, I don't have to buy baby formula anymore. He'll be graduated to MILKKK :) Good ol' milk.
I WILL however, be adding a new car payment to the equation.
OWCH.
YESTERDAY Christopher Michael and I celebrated 6 months of being in love, OUTSIDE of the womb. Hahaha... He's so freaking gorgeous. I have a new video I'm downloading of him to post on here.
OOH it's ready lol...
so... click the link... and enjoy :)
http://s23.photobucket.com/albums/b383/teendisaster143/?action=view¤t=ChristopherMisc-2.flv
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[07 Oct 2006|01:12pm] |
Here's how our talk went..
"Ah-goo" says he.
"Ah-goo" says I.
"Bloo buh"
"Bloo buh"
"Gaah nom"
"Gaah nom"
And it goes on and on and on.
The most tender, fulfilling conversation of my life.
I don't even know what the subject is?
But it's the best thing I've ever talked about, with my favorite person on the planet.
I love him so much it should be a crime.
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kissicrissi's journal